#Daysoffwithkeek ft @jordanbakeyphoto

There’s really no Better feeling in the world than receiving ” You can take tomorrow off If you’d like” texts for your manager. God bless her money hungry soul. Off on a TUESDAYYY! 💯 🙏🏻 So naturally I decided to seized the day! I got in contact with @jordanbakeyphoto, who’s is truly one of the most talented and beautiful human beings you will ever meet. Inside and out. and we planned a whimsy styled sunset shoot! 💋 

Dress: forever 21 

MUA: yours truly 😜 

with a little help from my new NARS pallet 

10/10 would recommend to a friend or enemy. 

LOCATION LOCATION LOCATION. 

Lake clementine: 😍 x 10000

I had the whole day off, so I choose to spend my time wisely. Started the morning making a custom floral crown. Compliments to my mamas garden. Tehehe. 

Supplies : 

wire: for the base 

Floral tap: Michaels 

Wild flowers (any) 

Scissor: “snip snip” 

 I hope this isn’t just a bunch of photos to skim through… I hope this encourages you to reach out to people. Collaborate. Learn from eachother. Love on new human beings. Grow. Pursue your passions. Get out there. Whatever it is that gets you going. Do it everyday. Doing something you want to be good at is the only advice that works and the only advice I can truly bless you with. I met Jordan last year before she started pursuing her dream of photography and I’m blown away abou how far she’s grown and how much her photography has progressed. Her biggest tip? DO IT EVERYDAY. Practice doesn’t mean perfect. Practice makes you better. Hope you enjoy our mini shoot that we may or may not have had to trespass and hike miles for. 😘😂🌟💕🍁🌵🌻🍂💕💯🌟


Xoxo keeks 😘

Photos By: the amazing Jordan baker. 

I’ve linked her website below

https://jordanbakey.wixsite.com/jordanbakey

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#daysoffwithkeek ft LA 

I have mixed emotions about being home. All the fun in the sun this weekend was one for the books! Los Angels was hit with a heat wave and we were loving it! I think this was the first time in years that I was able to actually enjoy swimming for more than 5 minutes. Tehehe. We spent all day swimming, tanning & eating LEMONADE. Naturally. God bless whoever planted that devine restaurant walking distance from Manhattan beach CA. Enjoyyy ~



Although most of this weekend getaway involved beach bummin, my sweet sweet sissy & I got a chance to sneak away for a sister date and explore downtown LA. 

But first. Coffee ♡

1. Carrera

8251 Melrose Ave, Los Angeles, CA 90046

2. Laudrée 

311 N Beverly Dr, Beverly Hills, CA 90210

Beverly Hills THATS WHERE I WANNA BEEE. Cutest little French bakery ever! 10/10.  


3. Paul Smith limited 

8221 Melrose Ave, Los Angeles, CA 90046

Instagram heaven! This pretty pink wall was to die for! Xoxo

Xoxo keeks 

7 Instagram worthy spots in SF

#Daysoffwithkeek ft 7 Instagram worthy spots in San Francisco, CA. 
I love days off. There’s something so magical about walking up in complete silence with no alarm clock to turn off 🙂 As per usual it was the weekend and I was itching to get out of town. Last weeks segment of #daysoffwithkeek took place in San Francisco CA. Enjoy ~

#1 Hawk hill

Conzelman Rd, Sausalito, CA 94965

First things first! The most iconic spot in SF. The Golden Gate Bridge. With its beauty and grace. Madison and I nearly flew off the edge of the hill for these shots, teeheehehe
@madisongmaldonado


@thehlenses 📸

#2 Cafe réveille 

610 Long Bridge St, San Francisco, CA 94158

Lunch break / coffee run at the cutest freaking cafe ever! They brew some of the best coffee ever. Mm currently craving a vanilla latte. Heart eyes x 100 

Yes Thai chicken salad 10/10 and 
@jijibaby

#3 Ampersand 

80 Albion St, San Francisco, CA 94103

The cutest flower shop everrrr. Like can it get any cuter? No. The answer is no. They have some of the best variety & freshly cut blooms. 



#4 Sutro baths 

1004 Point Lobos Ave, San Francisco, CA 94121

@rubinafleurphotos 


#5 Jane on filmore 

2123 Fillmore St, San Francisco, CA 94115


#6 Succulence

402 Cortland Ave, San Francisco, CA 94110

The cutest little shop full of unique plants, vertical gardens, terrariums + home decor

#7 Hollow cafe ❤

1435 Irving St, San Francisco, CA 94122

Iconic for its emerald green color choice, this sweet little coffee shop was our last stop +coffee pick-me-up before we headed home.  



Xoxo Keeks 

Daysoffwithkeek ft Seattle 

SMF ✈️ SEA
Daysoffwithkeek ft Seattle
Go while you’re young… Go while you have no responsibilities. While youre single. Travel, as often as you can. If no one can go, go alone. Explore, wander, connect, get lost in new places. Meet new people, catch up with old ones.
I’m always itching to escape my current resting place. I’m never content. I always want more. I wanna do it all, see it all, experience everything and anything. I’m constantly running on this idea that life is short and I’m wasting my youth. I have this fear that I’ll wake up when I’m 50 and realize that I waste my golden years being afraid of being alone. Afraid of leaving the comforts of home. Stuck working that 9-5 office job while everything I want is outside of comfort.
A few years back I vowed that I’d live my life to its fullest when my brother passed away in 2013 and I’m on a mission. To get the most of life. To travel more. Love more. Judge less. Spread kindness and love everywhere I go.
I urge you to save money. Plan. Explore. Seek. Wander. Wing it. Chase your passions. Chase dreams. Even the unrealistic ones. Reach destinations. Get out of your comfort zone and experience the world.
Im starting my quest off small! We hit Seattle this last weekend and then drove down to Spokane WA for my cousins dream wedding in the forest. ( Teehee all this meant was getting to dress up in all my new dresses and cute rompers) 🙂 Got a little taste of something new and learning that traveling, flighing alone and figuring out new locations isn’t as complicated as I thought it would be!
Naturally we started with breakfast and made our way to some of the cutest coffee shops and waffle houses! This trip was one for the books! Hope you enjoy all the little flicks from my adventure.
Xo xo #daysoffwithkeek 🦄✨💕🌻🍦

Dear Justin Bieber,

As a matter of fact, I will go and love myself.

In a world full of narcissist I still still can’t believe how many of us struggle with insecurity and self love. We are a generation that compares, evaluates and judges ourselves with great scrutiny. But if I were to be completely honest i’d admit to the fact that a lot of times I catch myself playing God. I run my own show. I am my number one priority, self centered, and conceited. You are on days off with Keek featuring everyone else. But if I love myself so damn much why am I so empty? And why do I look up to you for self worth and approval?

I wake up feeling empty. You know that disgusting feeling you get when you’re in trouble? That feeling deep in the pit of your stomach. Imagine that feeling. Every morning @7 am. I close my eyes and attempt to shake these feelings. They are not relevant. “I am loved by the king of all kings”. I repeat this several times. These feelings are heavy. They weigh me down. I am stuck paralyzed in my bed. Again I close my eyes and pray and I repeat, “I am loved by the king of all kings”, his love is enough. I am enough.

You’re talking but I can’t hear a word you’re saying. Mostly because I’m thinking about myself. The mind is beautiful but deadly, and I am drowning in a sea of my own thoughts. Thoughts that consume me and take me to the darkest and ugliest places. My mind is never at ease. You can argue the fact that this is all just in my head, and Id agree. It is. But thats the worst part. Its all in my head, and there is no escaping my mind.

No one plans to find themselves in this situation. I did not plot to hand my identity over to anyone. But when I look back and trace all of the steps I took that led me here. I find that, that’s exactly what I did. I just didn’t know at the time how much breaking up with someone would impact me. I made him too big and God too small. I look around and find all of my self worth and value in other people. I am nothing without your approval. I have no opinions. No thoughts of my own. I am a people pleasing cookie cutter. Lost and insecure.

I recall feeling so lost. As if the world somehow was falling apart and I was slipping into the cracks of darkness. Losing myself. The thought of being vulnerable still makes me cringe. I was caught in a web of his thoughts and opinions. I didn’t even have time to realize that I had a self love problem until I was alone. Being alone made me question everything I once believed and stood for. I realiz now that I had no voice. I honored and valued things that I didn’t even believe in. I accepted and followed guidelines just because the person who I Idolized followed them. I was nothing without the confidence that he gave me. Without him I am lost. Worthless.

Self love and confidence isn’t taught or encouraged enough, if even at all. And If you’re anything like me you’re always waiting for the next step. Never satisfied or content with the here and now. Always thinking “if only”‘then I’d be happy, or “When this finally happens” I’ll be content. But the truth is… If You don’t love yourself now. You won’t love yourself then. I never imagined loving myself to be this challenging. Most times I find this journey to be so painful and lonely, but I am thankful for this has forced on a journey to trust God with everything. To look beyond my physical self and focus on what is eternal. I am still learning. Still waiting for freedom, trusting Gods timing.

Our thoughts are so powerful. We are what we repeatedly do. If you repeatedly think negative thoughts about yourself you are only going to find yourself falling deeper and deeper in self hate and insecurity. Think positive and beautiful thoughts! Your identity is not in your boyfriend, husband, friends or family. Your identity is in Jesus who is never changing! Find comfort in that alone.

You are coming home, to yourself. Enjoy the journey.

Xoxo Keek 🍒

 Jenny Yarmoluk took this photo

Everyday should be Mother’s Day.

Although most of my blog posts are usually about me getting out of town and running away from my problems. This one is in particular is Keek ft @themanuylovshouse. For the past week I have been spending an enormous amount of time with my sister @missbrunetka and my niece Domnika (Aka Kotya), who is literally the cutest baby I’ve ever seen!! Please do not fight me on this one.


For most of you who know me on a personal level, you already know that @mr_manulov aka (Larry berry aka my sister’s husband) and @missbrunetka are my go to’s, my right hand(s). They have literally been there for me since day one. Supporting, feeding, housing me, helping me through my break ups, hangups, trials, and tribulations. They are the most selfless, kind, and genuinely beautiful human beings that I’ve ever encountered. And I’m so damn lucky to have them. Long story short if you’ve ever done me wrong, just know my sister and her husband know about it and they don’t like you.


PC: @jennywennypennypants http://jennywennypennypants.com

So…while @mr_manulov is out of town on “business” LOL just kidding he’s out in Ethiopia scouting for his mission trip for future surgeries with his team. If you’re interested in further knowledge of his team and there mission visit

http://www.facesoftomorrow.org


  
Larrys out of town… So I figured this is the perfect opportunity to come over and spend more time with Kotya🐱 ( which is kitty in Russian)  Lets just say I had no idea what I was getting myself into. I fantasized this whole week to be filled with nothing but giggles and cuddles topped off with sleeping in and seizing the week that I requested off. I SIGNED UP FOR THIS.


My fantasy quickly turned into a week of crying, screaming, changing diapers, and catering to Domnikas every need and complaint. I’m not even going to mention how many times she threw up on me. It was exhausting. I was anxious, stressed, sleep deprived and cranky. Don’t get me wrong, watching my sister take care of her daughter is one of the most beautiful and selfless thing I’ve ever seen. But I never realized what being a mom really meant.


This honestly got me thinking so much about my own mom and all of the times I have taken her for granted. LOL I told myself I wouldn’t cry. But I’m just having one of those days. Having my mom by my side this morning, just talking and listening to sermons reminding me of how valued and loved I really am. No one will ever care about you as much as your mom cares about you. Happy for my happiness. Sad for my sadness. Now that’s what real love looks like.


Current mood: In bed, rolled up in a ball trying not to cry. Lol. My mother is my heart. Growing up with her was a different story. She was the enemy, someone who I had to lie and hide things from. It wasn’t until I fully grew up and faced struggles/heart aches of my own that I realized how much my mom did for me all those years & still does to this day. We all have flaws and I am by no means saying that my mom is perfect or raised me perfectly, but she did the best she could with what she had. My mom is amazing, wonderful and loving. Being a mom is probably the hardest BUT most rewarding job. YES. JOB! Maybe job isn’t even the right title, Because you never clock out. Maybe it should be considered a lifestyle or (a freaking sacrifice.)  Your kids will outgrow your arms, but never your heart. LOL this coming from a 23 year old who is getting supported by both of her parents and still living under there roof. (oops) no shame whatsoever.


The long sleepless nights and hectic days. It’s exhausting. Today was a bittersweet morning, as we sipped our coffee and enjoyed each others company. I was reminded to values and love my mama. My emotions got the best of me and I found myself with both arms wrapped around her sweet, soft neck. I felt tears slowly rolling down both side of my rosy pink cheeks. In that moment I was reminded of just how much she does for me. From the never ending prayers,loads of perfectly folded clean laundry and hot prepped meals on the daily. Listening to all of my sob stories and genuinely being interested in my everyday life. MOM! you are a superhero, and to this day I still don’t know how you did it. Raising us 5 crazy kids, working a full time job and still keeping the house in order. I hope you remember to treat your mama right. Hug her , kiss her. Surprise her with flower or her favorite treat. {etc} But above all Materialist things. Respect, honor, and listen to her. Because mama knows best.


‬ “You must honor and respect your father and your mother. Do this so that you will have a full life in the land that the Lord your God gives you.”

‭‭Exodus‬ ‭20:12‬ ‭ERV‬‬


Mother dearest. At age 18.  Most likely already had her whole life figured out. 

In loving Memory of Andre Petkov/FOREN DRE

The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind. I remember thinking this would never happen to my family. People die everyday. It’s just a part of life. I hate talking about my brothers death… If you have never experienced the loss of someone you love, this blog post Isn’t for you. I don’t expect you to relate or understand. There is no quick fix, no remedy, there is nothing you can say or do to fill the void. It is a constant ache in your heart that consumes your whole entire body. It is a chronic pain that doesn’t subside.

Losing my brother was like losing a part of me. All of our childhood memories fading into nothing. Some days I wonder if you were even here. How can someone be here one day and gone the next. Did you even exist? I could write my thoughts off as crazy. Maybe I was crazy. Maybe you never existed. Maybe I thought you up in my head a long time ago. It’s like waking up from a dream, and not knowing what was reality and what wasn’t. I close my eyes just to meet yours in my thoughts and memories. I see sweet brown eyes smiling back at me.

In a room full of people my eyes still search for you. Flashbacks of you still linger to this day. I miss you so much. But the world does not stop and wait for you to be okay. It waits for no one. We are expected to get back to work and life as if nothing happened. I can’t believe it’s been three years already Dre. I feel like you’re missing everything. It’s not fair. Life’s not fair. So much has changed since we last spoke. Alena had a baby. Remember how we’d always joke about how Bella (the dog) was our only niece? lol. I know you would have been the best uncle.

Your absence alone shattered our whole family. I’ve never felt so broken. So confused. I’ve never prayed so hard. Praying for God to turn back the hands of time. If only we talked the night before. The what if’s and what could have been. But nothing was more painful than listening to all of the “christian’s” comments and judgemental remarks. I think that was my breaking point. You were gone. Nothing and no one could hurt you anymore. And the people who you’d expect to give you the most support did the complete opposite. Instead it was our family who had to bear your loss and as if our world wasn’t already falling apart we had deal wolves in sheeps clothing. There words held so much power.

” If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person’s religion is worthless. James 1:26 “

You were the most amazing and talented artist. Kind hearted and so smart. You dreamed without borders. Young and reckless. Enjoying everyday. You taught me so many important things. Losing you changed my perspective on everything. I began to live more fully, love more deeply. Appreciate and value everyone who was in my life. I became more accepting and forgiving. It opened my eyes to so many things I was doing wrong as a christian. You always looked out for the underdog. A friend to everyone. I miss your big bear hugs that used to make me feel so small. All 6 feet and 3 inches wrapped around me. Or how you’d lay in my bed and ask me to braid your hair lol. Never did end up giving you those cornrows you always wanted. LOL. I miss coming home and finding you in my room with my guitar in your arms, playing the only three chords you could remember after two years of guitar lessons lol. I miss everything about you. The good and the bad. You are so dearly missed Andre. Rest in paradise big brother. Until we meet again.

 

In Loving Memory of Andre Petkov. 09-04-1990 – 03-16-2013